A: The Mistress Jade Trophy Game, Pt.1

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(Kathy glares at Fred)
Fred: Ma'am, I'd be more than happy to tell you the whole story in the morning—
—oh, all right, fine! That photograph represents the prize in "The Mistress Jade Trophy Game," a competition got up by the men in the Household Guard. If a man was able to capture, conceal, and hold onto that photography for seventy-two consecutive hours, the other guys had to chip in to buy him a session at "The House of the Setting Sun," Mistress Jade's bordello on the west side of town. It's not a house of ill repute; in face, it has three stars in the Michelin Guide. It's quite the nicest house in the neighborhood. Clean, tidy, painted—of course that makes it suspect among the sheyenas. Some people have even mistaken it for the Palace— or at least, that's the alibi they gave... but I digress...

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B: The Mistress Jade Trophy Game, Pt.2

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Fred (telling story): When I discovered the game, I burned the photograph to show them that I was not going to stand for such hijinx. I had thought that would settle it, but it was only the opening shot in a battle of wits in which I was outnumbered. They responded by shirking their duties and sneaking off to Jade's, running up such a huge tab that she eventually summoned me to her establishment to complain about the shabby behaviour of my unit. She threatened to go to my commanding officer if something wasn't done to rectify the situation. That would have been the end of my military career. So I rectified it.